By Dorothy J. Hill
Do What You Need to Do for You
In life, there are many different situations that we must deal with and face. As we grow older into our adult lives, many of these situations present challenges that must be overcome in order to advance to the next level. Sometimes that may mean doing things that you don’t necessarily want to do and it’s something that we all go through. In order to be rewarded with “diamonds and pearls”, you have to go through the mud and grime. It sucks; it really does, because not everyone is born with privilege. Some of us have to work incredibly hard to even feel some sense of happiness or content. But, I digress. I actually do appreciate the benefits of hard work, because then you are able to enjoy life a lot more and reap more benefits because it was you who put in the effort to make sure you had what you wanted and needed.
Now it may be considered slightly selfish if you focus on yourself for long periods of time, however, I figure if you don’t look after yourself or do for yourself, then who will? There comes a time in a person’s life where, yes, they will have to be responsible for the well-being of others. What I mean by this is something we experience all the time, whether it is completing chores around the house, running errands for family or anything else along those lines. But on the other hand of things, there also comes a time when you have to take responsibility for what takes place in your life and how you want your life to be. I guess you can say while you’re in college, that is the time where you begin to take this responsibility for yourself and accomplish those things that will help you to be successful in life.
At this point of my life, I have been feeling multiple emotions where many things are concerned. I sometimes find myself having difficulty understanding why I had to experience certain things that I had already experienced. A prime example would be my graduation requirements. As of the fall semester, there were only about 11 credits that I needed to fulfill my graduation requirements. At that point, I had only wanted to take what I needed for graduation, along with an extra class that would actually be beneficial to my musicianship. There was one particular class that I felt I didn’t need to be in because I had fulfilled the requirements set forth but as part of the policy of the department, it was still a requirement to take this class. I absolutely hated that I had to deal with this. I did not want to be in the class. I figured I could use this class time for something a lot better and useful. But, here was a situation where I had to go through a murky experience in order to come out smooth and clean.
I still have to be in this particular class again for the spring semester. I still hate it too, but you have to do what you have to do. I have come to a place in life, though, where I do not fall short of being brutally honest. Sometimes this can work against you, but it is much better to be brutally honest than to tell a lie just to appease someone else. As I have learned in life, feelings mean nothing. The world and business world is cut-throat and you have to be able to deal with any and everything that comes your way. I certainly expressed my frustration and disgust with the situations I had to deal with, but it is something that comes with this particular territory. I guess this was one of those cases where the rebel in me started to kick in. Too many thoughts began running through my head. I got to a point where I realized that I don’t have to be here, but at the same time I do. It may seem like a contradiction but here is where the truth comes through.
Now, no, I don’t have to be in school because it is a choice. However, considering the way life is as a whole, with the economy, the country and just being able to do anything in life, it is rather necessary to be in school. Much of the reason why I have had such strong negative feelings towards many of my experiences came from the thought that “I should not still be in undergrad”. Technically, if I had finished as I had expected in May of 2011, I would be in the process of finishing my first year of grad school, but things didn’t go that way. I’m not particularly experiencing the effects of senioritis, I just got to a point where I was and am tired of being in school. I began to lack the motivation to get through everything. Then, I had an epiphany. Everything happens for a reason. Again, another cliché, but it is true.
We all have these life encounters for a reason. They either happen to make us or break us. So instead of allowing something that happens in your life to break you, use it as a lesson. You are not going to get everything you want or that you think you deserve. I’m still kind of upset that I had to spend five years instead of four completing my undergrad, but these are the breaks. I have to be grateful though because I have been able to utilize this extra time to make sure I have what I need in place for grad school and life as a whole. I would have much rather preferred to be in a different place than I am now, but maybe, just maybe there is more work for me to do. Or maybe there is someone or something that I have yet to encounter that will catapult my thinking into a totally different direction. I really don’t know. Sometimes I sit back kind of dazed and confused at all that takes place around me. But, hey, it’s called life. You can either choose to live it or just live a dead life and there’s no fun in that.
Take the time out for yourself because no one else is going to do it for you. Do all the things that help you to be fulfilled, happy and content with life. Don’t be a stick in the mud. We all have to do things that we don’t really want to do whether it is in your personal or academic life. It just is what it is. So, stop fighting it and just accept it. This is what adulthood is all about.
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